When my therapist suggested more sleep, I paused. My mind immediately pushed back: Isn't that lazy? Aren’t I supposed to be hustling? Wasn’t there a hashtag telling me to grind harder?
I think a lot about the 40s-50s of American society and how much of the “dream” was a myth. A myth that targeted women in many ways…and so much about the myth required people to run themselves ragged.
I'm not sure what they call 'the American dream' today, but most women (and men) especially those with kids) are putting themselves through the ringer trying to keep up with an unrealistic expectation of what it means to be a good 'parent/provider/person in our culture. When my kids were in elementary and middle school, I was a single parent. All of the kids were playing multiple sports per season and the parents were all over the place. Literally needing to be in two places at once. I told my kids they could play one sport per season, because it wasn't possible for me to do otherwise. Other parents offered to help me so they could. I held on to my no and I'm so grateful I did. The days were already full from 6am - 10pm AND I STILL FELT LIKE I WAS FALLING SHORT AT THE TIME! Todays version of me mostly says no and never feels bad about it 🥳
Highly recommend! For me, the data and information she delivers on attachment theory and trauma was informative and easily digestible. I learned so much!
My favorite is when they suggest, “You should never work in your room. Work in a separate room from your bedroom, it’ll prevent burnout and anxiety,” and I’m just like, yeah, I’m fortunate enough to be able to do that, having an extra room, but if this is your pitch, dear therapist, you might wanna work on it. Most people DON’T have a spare room to designate just for sleeping.
I think a lot about the 40s-50s of American society and how much of the “dream” was a myth. A myth that targeted women in many ways…and so much about the myth required people to run themselves ragged.
Saying no no no to all of that!
I'm not sure what they call 'the American dream' today, but most women (and men) especially those with kids) are putting themselves through the ringer trying to keep up with an unrealistic expectation of what it means to be a good 'parent/provider/person in our culture. When my kids were in elementary and middle school, I was a single parent. All of the kids were playing multiple sports per season and the parents were all over the place. Literally needing to be in two places at once. I told my kids they could play one sport per season, because it wasn't possible for me to do otherwise. Other parents offered to help me so they could. I held on to my no and I'm so grateful I did. The days were already full from 6am - 10pm AND I STILL FELT LIKE I WAS FALLING SHORT AT THE TIME! Todays version of me mostly says no and never feels bad about it 🥳
lol at the camp certificate wording … also why is this still how my brain works expecting to get pats on the back at work…
Anyway. Definitely feel that on the adrenaline cocktail of the 20s and 30s, and the girlboss era fallout.
It’s those pats on the back that keep your brain going and showing! Until it’s not 😂
Glad that era has mostly run its course
I really need to get around to Polysecure. I have it, but just haven’t read it. Good stuff?
Highly recommend! For me, the data and information she delivers on attachment theory and trauma was informative and easily digestible. I learned so much!
“Does that sleep recommendation come with a Valium prescription, doc, or what, because 10 hours is *a lot* of sleep?”
The Polar Plunge sounds like my kinda party
My favorite is when they suggest, “You should never work in your room. Work in a separate room from your bedroom, it’ll prevent burnout and anxiety,” and I’m just like, yeah, I’m fortunate enough to be able to do that, having an extra room, but if this is your pitch, dear therapist, you might wanna work on it. Most people DON’T have a spare room to designate just for sleeping.
Haaahahaa so true. That is a luxury for some, if not most! Not to mention, I do some of my best work from bed 😂