Being Sex Positive in a Sex Negative Culture
Being Sex Positive in a Sex Negative Culture
How Can The Sex Be Great When We Can't See Through Our Conditioning
Last week it was announced that Danny Masterson from That 70’s Show was found guilty of and sentenced to prison for raping several women twenty years ago.
During his trial, people close to him were asked to write to the judge, on his behalf and share the kind of person he really is. Two of those people happened to be Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis.
When I read that in the news, I thought, are you fucking serious? Aren’t they supporters and advocates for victims of sexual abuse and an organization that works to prevent and end sex trafficking? How can you stand with victims and then write a letter talking about how great of a character a rapist has?
But the more I thought about it, the more I realized, of course they did. I have 2 reasons why I think this that I’ll get to in just a moment.
First I have to tell you that Season 3 of The Morning Show premiered last night. I’ve been waiting for this all too seriously for far too long. I have been fascinated watching this series address some of the most relevant topics of our time, while we are all still grappling with them as a culture.
Sexual Assault and Rape. Abuse of Power. Trauma. Racism. Cancel Culture. A Pandemic. Politics. Polarization. Etc. Etc. Etc.
The hook for me is watching and observing from my couch, how the individual characters process what is happening within their interpersonal relationships. Or not process.
Like Alex Levy finding out her work husband, best friend and a man she had sexual relations with was a sexual predator. On way hand she was shocked and wanted nothing to do with him and on the other, she missed her best friend. And then there was this mysterious third hand; she had turned a blind eye to his behavior and upheld the system that supported him.
Her brain cannot comprehend all of the ugly, horrific truth.
Which brings me back to why I think Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis wrote those letters:
For their brain to accept and believing their best friend as they know him is a rapist must be like a computer trying to download software that keeps glitching out. They are not ‘thinking straight’.
We live in a culture that historically nurtures rape and assault.
It’s impossible to talk about Sexual Health Awareness Month and not address the main factors that play a role in a majority of people not having great sex. In addition to a Rape Culture, we have thousands of years of conditioning around women’s bodies and sexuality. It’s not a coincidence, either. Instead it’s about control.
And despite the #metoo movement, we still have a lot of work to do.
Tune in today to hear what 3 cultural messages about women’s sexuality are and why The Sex Can’t Be Great, without awareness and acceptance that this is where we are as a collective.
